Animal 1: Racoons; these little creatures, as innocent as they may look, are actually as useless as one can be. Like seriously, I was looking around in the backyard today and saw one climb up onto the deck and looked like it was on a mission, but in fact, it wasn’t! To me it looked like it simply climbed a fence, took a small walk back and forth, and then went back into the woods. People may say it was looking for food, but to me this thing looked a bit fat...so it wouldn’t be looking for food. Maybe it was trying to lose weight or something, although there’s nothing wrong with being a fat animal...
One thing I’d hate to feed racoons is cocoons. I’m not doing this just because these words rhyme...I’m also saying this because I’d hate to see racoons with wings...we already have rats with wings (pigeons), how are we supposed to deal with racoons with wings? It’s crazy! Getting rid of racoons isn’t a problem...getting rid of their food source...garbage. But wait...you toss garbage into a garbage bin, you make more garbage...you toss that into another garbage bin, you make even more garbage! This means that racoons have an everlasting food source. Damn.
Animal 2: Hyenas; I’m not going to lie, I’m a funny person...but I’d never tell a joke to a hyena because they laugh at everything; I wouldn’t know which jokes to tell to who...but when I’m low in confidence, I’d buy a hyena and tell it some jokes because then I’d start thinking hey, at least I can make animals laugh...unless I manage to make a hyena stop laughing...in that case, I must really suck.
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2 comments:
And if a hyena didn't think you were funny, it wouldn't say it to your face. It would just bite your face off instead.
well, hyenas dont attack people they just scavenge, it's really rare for them to attack... just thought i'd throw thatin there.
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